Monday, March 29, 2010

I dreamed about having a son, but I have a daughter. What do I do?

Do you remember when your wife was expecting? Remember all the times you were asked, “what are you having,” or, “what would you like to have?” Your response was, “a son.” Why? Because you envisioned playing catch, taking your son to his sports practices, having those ‘manly talks,’ and going fishing.

But now your wife has graced you with a beautiful daughter, and you have no idea what to do with her. Those dreams of playing with a son have faded away. You are the father of a daughter. Now what do you do?

You need to realize that if you had a son, you wouldn’t know what to do either. Your dreams about your son were probably about him when he was 5 years old or older. So you need to know that you are like any other parent at the birth of their child; they all have no idea what they are going to do when they bring a baby home. And just so you know, whether it is a baby girl, or baby boy, eating, sleeping, and changing diapers is the same.

Of course, that isn’t a satisfactory answer to “what do I do now?” You do need to mourn the loss of your dreams. However, you need to realize the great adventure you are going to have with your daughter. Think of all the things you will be able to do with her as she grows up!

Did nothing come to mind? That’s okay. I will help you out.

Think of the first time you will be able to put her in ponytails, and how cute she will be.

Think of the first time she says ‘Daddy’ and comes running to you instead of mom.

Think of how she is your little princess, and how you have now become the strongest man in her life.

Think of the first time she falls asleep in your arms, and you have to continue holding her, even though your arms are numb, so that she doesn’t wake up.

I am sure you are getting the image in your mind.

Now, every time you start thinking about that ‘son’, quickly recall those images that I have told you, or ones that you have made up yourself. That way you will be able to replace those old images with new images of your daughter.

Just remember, you are not alone in this experience. Just go ask another father who wanted a boy but got a girl ask them how they adapted.

Also, go have a listen to Carrie Underwood’s song, All-American Girl, and realize that that daughter of yours will become the centre of your world, and will have you wrapped around her fingers!

1 comment:

  1. Great post! I think it's important that men can play sports/go fishing/talk with their daughters openly as well.